I’d actually play golf if it was anything like this as opposed to being a dull walk with expensive sticks.
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 Every discussion about belief. I used to maintain that I was an atheist back when I was younger and felt that I had a point to prove about just how independent I was in thought and deed. Eventually I came to the view that the denial of deities is rather pompous and crass filled, as it is, with rather the same level of presupposition as theism. Admittedly atheism is significantly more open to questioning what with its acceptance of proof – in the scientific sense – as an acceptable standard for discerning the existence of higher powers, but there remains a rather arrogant air about the whole mindset that I find distasteful. I still find it more acceptable than religion as a concept – I mean, at least question it in a rational manner – but it really isn’t for me. This sort of bullshit doesn’t help either.
Atheist. Temple. I repeat; Atheist. Temple. If that isn’t a pristine example of high-minded middle-class bullshit then I really don’t know what is. They really should build it though. If nothing else it will serve as a glorious paean to one man’s staggering hubris and provide the rest of us with a good laugh to boot. It’s a win-win. That aside, I do find myself echoing Mr. Dawkins’ sentiment that atheists don’t need temples because, oh wow. I exist! What the fuck is that? A bird? No way, that thing is flying on air currents that I can’t see, with wings that are perfectly adapted to do so and it’s making that shit look easy. THAT IS AMAZING. But yeah, a temple will definitely help people focus and be more astonished by the wonder of everything if they can’t already bring themselves to just look outside and realise they’re on a rock that’s hurtling through space around a giant nuclear furnace of unimaginable power and that IT. IS. MIND-BLOWING. As for everything else well, apatheism pretty much covers it. Or doesn’t. Whatever. I received a text today that spake thusly:
I wasn’t sure as to the veracity of this message so I consulted a close personal friend. Whist remonstrating with a paper jam in one of our more belligerent photocopiers I managed to hack a chunk out of my finger through a combination of incaution and clumsiness. Having done so, I did what any sensible human being would do and immediately stuck the offending wound in my mouth, whereupon I discovered something alarming. I rather like the taste of my own blood. … Even I find that a bit weird. Because I am a calm and rational man who in no way delights in conflict I did not, upon discovering my drive blocked by someone else’s car, box them in so that the vehicle in question would remain trapped in place for the five hours it took me to go for a ride, visit the gym, attend the shops and then have dinner. I didn’t do this because it was more like five-and-a-half hours and I actually had a little stop off to take some photographs and have a drink. Oh, details, details. Once I again took interest I found that, to my sincere delight, someone had affixed an angry note to my windscreen along with a telephone number that, to this very day, remains unrung. Whomever is on the other end of those arcane digits shall forevermore remain one of life’s unsolved mysteries: like where milk comes from. I am not without heart – no matter what science tells you – and I have since released their poorly positioned motor so that they may return to their no doubt lovely abode and ponder the importance of consideration and the role it plays in a healthy society. Hopefully this will lead to the revelation that, by being a little inconsiderate, you can inadvertently prompt a complete stranger to consider you fair game and, by extension, initiate a round of petty, mindless retribution that really fucks up your evening. Oh, I know I’m a dick. But hey, if you don’t want to wake a tiger, don’t pull its tail. |
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