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Post office clerks put up signs saying position closed And secretaries turn off typewriters and put on their coats Janitors padlock the gates For security guards to patrol And bachelors phone up their friends for a drink While the married ones turn on a chat show And they’ll all be lonely tonight [...] It did it again. I run up to the door, get ready to hurl the book onto the counter and flee when, ‘Oh look, Jerome K. Jerome’s Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow. I’ll just read a few pages, just a few.’ Next thing it’s seven bloody thirty and I’ve lost another evening. Damn [...] I’ve been ill since the weekend and it’s set me thinking that men have an arse backwards approach to illness. At the moment I have what could be called man flu. Obviously I’m convinced that it’s SARS or bubonic plague but in truth I have a cold, I ache a bit and most of [...] Being a time travelling superhero-genius like myself you soon find that your life is full of nemesises or nemesisi or nemeses, whichever is the accurate term (yes I know it’s the third one.) These foul villains constantly obstruct your path and try to ensnare you in their naughty ways. I am unlucky in having [...] I’m a compulsive taker of personality tests, I can’t help myself. I like to see what the answers are, if I expect them and what they mean. I don’t know why I do this to myself because I’m invariably worried by their accuracy. I imagine in the same way that some people worry about [...] |
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