There was a time when I thought of Lidl as a terrible place strewn with the detritus of society, people too scurrilous even to be allowed into Iceland or Aldi. I’ll tell you what though, I was very, very wrong.
Well no, actually, I wasn’t. There’s some weird folk go in there, people who spend the daylight hours beneath rocks and at the back of caves, but the food is pretty decent. For example, you can buy lobsters and pheasant and something that looks like it might be a fish but doesn’t taste like it. I mean, ok, they’re frozen and you wouldn’t serve them in a restaurant, but they’re tasty and that’s all I’m fussed about.
I’ll admit to retaining a certain amount of suspicion about the place, I’m not that sure that I’m not eating food comprised solely of ash and MSG just yet, but I’m slowly coming around to the idea that, just because it’s cheap, doesn’t mean it’s principal ingredients are broken glass and poison. I could be wrong, obviously, but most of the stuff just appears to have been imported from Germany and Spain. I’ve been pretending that I’m eating holiday food which makes for fun mealtimes and a desire to buy postcards.
No Vla though, which is a shame. That crazy Dutch custard* is amazing stuff.
There is a downside however, namely that the presence of a Lidl indicates two things.
1. I live in a less than salubrious area (this is because I’m bohemian by the way. No, I am. Seriously. Stop laughing.)
2. Some poor bastards are being worked to the bone for tuppence so I can buy surprisingly nice lager for £8 a crate.
You can’t have everything I suppose.
*Does anyone else think that ‘Dutch custard’ sounds like a particularly seedy euphemism?
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