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LEJOG

Hate mail

U best b careful dissin Netherfield I kno were u liv

Yes, but then I ‘dissed’ Netherfield in a post where I mentioned that I also live there, so you’re not exactly a rocket scientist, are you? No, don’t argue, you’re not. Rocket scientists can spell.

Sadly, this means that you’re going to have to try a lot harder if you really want to become my Nemesis. Moriary McEvil, for example, has a giant gilded dirigible with a weather machine on board so powerful that it can call down lightnings and hailstones the size of an elephant’s knacker. And what do you have, poor grammar? Please.

Now, I suggest that you go away and, if you’re really serious about this, should probably make a start by building a secret lair inside Skull Mountain and designing an elaborate death ray before you start threatening me with information so secret that it’s in the possession of THE ENTIRE FUCKING INTERNET.

Actually, no, don’t bother. I’ll just give Moriarty McEvil a call and let him know that his position as my Nemesis is safe, and we’ll leave it at that shall we? Yes? Good.

Funny old world.

  • http://www.ndJillWentUpTheHill.com NightJack

    I love you.

    This is LOVE MAIL!

    • http://www.nunoncastors.co.uk James

      Cheers J.