I cycle, yes? I do it quite a lot. It is, I suppose, my hobby. I pursue this hobby on a relatively inexpensive bike, with a few extras of intermediate cost, and I cover around 100 miles a week. It is not all-consuming, but it is fun and I do enjoy myself.
Why, then, have I just seen the fattest man in the universe, someone who clearly doesn’t cycle any further than the fudge factory, trundle past me on a bike worth just under £4,000? It is a cycle I would literally kill for, and here he is grinding the gears and riding it into kerbs as though it were nothing.
Obviously I’m jealous, but what the fuck world, what are you playing at?
Don’t knock cycling to the fudge factory – he needs a bick to carry his goodies
*bike even
I would suspect that the Fat Man stole it!! as if he was someone who could afford a four grand bike, they would have a Car and only use a bike like that for cycling based pursuits.
I’m now on the lookout for the fat man on the basis that he probably saw how awesome Sir Wheels-a-lot was and nicked him.