See what I’m doing with the title there? I’m making light of a serious issue. This is called being self-deprecating. Along with a stiff upper lip and a flair for understatement this is one of the ways you can tell I’m British. Admiral Beatty was British too. Having watched two of his battle-cruisers explode and disintegrate under German fire at the Battle of Jutland, he made the comment: “There seems to be something wrong with our bloody ships today…”
I feel this is why we sometimes confuse peoples of other nations.
Anyway, I am not mental. Today marks an anniversary with regards to my oft lamented depression. It is significant in many ways. It is significant because it marks the start of my getting better. Which, by the way, I am (can I get a whoop whoop?) Mainly though it is significant because it marks the fact that I am still here despite my previous idiocy and fondness for sharp things (my wit excepted. Ho, ho, ho.)
This makes the world a better place by 0.0000539%.
I do not apologise for any suffering my continued existence may have caused. You love it, you know you do.
Though, I am sorry about that incident with the Jehovah’s Witnesses. I did not mean to…
Actually, yes I did. 8:30 on a Sunday morning for fuck’s sake. I was hung over and irate at being woken by bloody god botherers. Frankly, a can of silly string was the least they deserved.
Bastards.
I have just told a mate i want to be a man, is the other side worth it ? do tell.
JEZ IS A WOMAN (?)
Seriously though, good for you, Chris. I mean, James. Depression is not easy, getting over it is even harder. Good show!
well, half and half
Whoop whoop.
We had some Mormons round recently. They left us their Bible to read and then came round to collect it and have another chat about it a week or so later. They were mid-western, country music lovin’ Americans. We quizzed them a lot about it. All awkward questions were answered with something along the lines of an irrelevant question or quote on how amazing god is. Discussions drew to an end, with neither party having changed the mind of the other, and they made to leave.
On the way to the door, some small talk was made: (them) “So what are you guys up to tonight?”
(us) “We’re off to the cinema actually”
(them) “Oh cool, what are you going to see?”
(us) “Brokeback Mountain”
(them) “Oh, not heard of that one, whats it about?”
(us) “Its a film about two gay cowboys”
(them) “……………………………………” (exit door front)
And congrats too James, I am very pleased for you. I have some mighty fine photos from our night out a little while ago. I shall see what I can do to get them on this ‘ere interweb.
Being a man. On the plus side you can fart all you want, pee standing up, be childish and infantile (and no one minds,) you don’t need makeup (unless you’re bored,) and you understand the offside rule.
You will never have to squeeze a baby through an apeture that is too small.
On the down side you can get kicked in the testicles. This is like the world ending right in your groin.
Stay a lady. Ladies are generally better (note for that lads. This is a lie.)
Also, who is this Chris and has he conquered his depression too?
Tom. I thought the gay cowboy film sucked (ho ho) and lacked content. What did you make of it? I am glad the mermen (or whatever) didn’t like it either, more for your sake though.
The photos need emailing.
I need a better way of structuring my replies.
You are sweet. I feel like rubbing your cheeks! And i know you wont like me saying that, coz yor ‘ard
Well, maybe not but you will just want to put me straight on the matter.
Don’t rub his cheeks. I’m sure I’ve felt like doing that before, and when I got close, he looked at me funny.
I wouldn’t want to presume but perhaps you were attempting to rub his butt cheeks.
With regards to kicking in the nuts - go here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7felIygZ6Y4
but NOT NOT NOT at work.
I was fairly unimpressed by the film too, but it was a reasonable effort from the man who bought you “Hulk”.
FACTS.
JJ, you licked my cheek (on my face) hence the funny look.
Jez, you’re thinking of Simon. He also got a funny look (for bum touching.)
Tom, fair point about the film. It is an improvement on Hulk.
Why should the link not be viewed at work? I need to know or I’ll click it in about 5 minutes.
Bit late, but meh. Its japanese women (vaguely dressed as schoolgirls) beating the crap out of various mens genitals (not literally, but you know what I mean). All genitalia is pixelated over, and most of the time they’re in the men are in their undies, but its a niche fetish for someone out there!
That’s a bit strong mate. Made me feel queasy for about four hours. You’ve got to ask yourself why.